Poems continued...

Dissonance

How often was
the string strummed
forcing ripples
cutting through the fabric
of time and space.

So close to being perfect
and still such an unstable combination
caught between the third and the sixth
a pinch
of heaven above and earth beneath
the air carried
a painful gift
it boosted the white noise
within the inner ears labyrinth
tightening the skin of the drum
with a conflicting tension
active and haunting
close to equilibrium
far from satisfying
an ever humming murmur
on the heart line


Regal grief

How regal that
sense of grief
it shone like a crown
upon your brow
bereft in the nature
of our existence
saltwater puddles formed
beneath the tired
circles of your eyes
My hand tried comfort
only to lay like a shadow
on you skin
it's warmth could not permeate
nor pull together
that great divide
you where trying to jump
as you where
caught vividly in mid air
utter groundless
shaky, tender naked

Inner electric

The was a lot of re wiring to do
tremors kept knocking me down
as my chest was beaten raw
by the electric currents
constantly fazing
between negative and positive
plus / minus
nothing was a greater contrast
than the impulse for control
I got punched in the face
my lip was sore
bellowing
my breath was heavy and thick
smoke started veiling
the four walls
of the solitary confinement
called my life

Sick of you

I thought I was sick
and realized it was you
the abject non presence
I was punishing myself once again
and you where the subject of my tormenter
because YOU did nothing
and I was alone
even though love had been proclaimed
there was nobody here except ME
my lungs where sore
and the lurid stench of sickness
clung to me just as tightly
as the sweat on my back
making everything
extremely uncomfortable

You never came and soothed
this retched girl
my fever heightened even more
twisting and burning me up
plunging it's shiny knives
deep into my flesh
I was pulling at my skin
trying to escape
my nails scratching
the canvas of my belly
where your hand once lay
erasing the etchings
that you had imprinted
upon me

I slumped into stupor
there was nothing else
on my mind
besides self pity
constantly restraining
bitter and sweet
like molasses on a silver spoon
just to remind me
that I was guilty
and oh how I wanted to be guilty
let it soothe me, tell me
that I am in the right
you are in the wrong
it would be so simple
everything is like failure
these days passed
stolen from nowhere
timeless ticking
not even the phases of the moon
had anything to say

I swallowed the plastic coated tablets
in naive hope of relief
they took the sickness
but no the cause
I kept checking the phone
for wanted messages
that never materialized
come to my rescue
desperate child
how long had I been like this
Samsara of self imposed neglect
when did this begin

I saw you come towards me
gingerly
trying to ease
everything
we where both ill!